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Ask Maya: The Case Of The Comfortable Boyfriend

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  • October 2014

    Halloween can be a fun time for couples. Depending on the length and level of comfort of your relationship, it can be a great bonding (and hilarious) experience to dress in complimentary costumes. It makes for great shared memories and shows your friends that you’re committed to each other.

    NOTE: If you haven’t been dating for a long time, couples costumes could be a bad idea. You wouldn’t want to have a bad memory from one of the most fun holidays of the year. Decide carefully.

    Anyway, me and my team came up with a list of original couples costumes you could wear if you decide to dress up together. Comment at the end with your favorite couples costumes.

    1. Jasmine and Aladdin
    2. Bar of soap and loofah
    3. Baywatch
    4. Lois Lane and Clark Kent
    5. Dora and Diego
    6. Cat and mouse
    7. Danny Zuko and Sandy
    8. Firefighter and Dalmatian
    9. Geeks
    10. Milk and cereal
    11. The Flintstones
    12. David Beckham and Posh Spice
    13. Fantastic Mr Fox and Mrs Fox
    14. Sookie Stackhouse and Bill Compton
    15. Walter White and Jesse
    16. Sonny and Cher
    17. Miley Cyrus and a wrecking ball
    18. Lucy and Ricky Ricardo
    19. Titanic
    20. Salt and pepper
    21. Lady bug and bumble bee
    22. Tarzan and Jane
    23. Bonnie and Clyde
    24. Doctor and Nurse
    25. Jack and Sallie
    26. Roger and Ebert
    27. Mom and baby
    28. Bank robber and lady officer
    29. Beauty and the Beast
    30. Aladdin and Apu

    What would you add to this list?

  • Relationship Advice For September

    Did you meet a mysterious man this past weekend and you're not sure how to keep him on the edge? Here are a few great tips that will keep him wanting more!

  • August

    When you need a pick-me-up or some motivation to keep on looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right, just take a look at some of these love/dating images. 

    PS: you might notice them from my official Facebook page, but thought it'd be nice to have them on the site so we can put them on Pinterest :)


  • April 2013

  • February 2013

  • August 2012

  • April 2012

  • March 2012

  • February 2012

Find your Rewarding Relationship!
October 20, 2014


Dear Maya,

My boyfriend never wants to do anything. He plays video games all weekend long. He works a lot during the week, so I understand, but he never wants do anything on the weekend. How do I get him excited about going out and doing things with me?


Liz, 27, Brooklyn, NY

Dear Liz,

It’s important to have mutual interests and activities with your partner. This is a common dilemma that occurs with couples who’ve been together for a long time; in a sense, the honeymoon phase is over and each partner gets comfortable with where the relationship stands because no one needs to woo the other any longer. If this is a newer relationship, you might be in trouble. Take a step back and analyze if you’re in the right relationships.

No matter what stage your relationship is in (including when you’re married), you have to continue to grow together. The easiest way to do this is by doing activities that you both enjoy together. The less easy way to do this is to do things that other person likes to do (while making sure they’re also sacrificing as well). In the end, it’s about balance.

Here are some tips to help you with your dilemma:

  1. Make sure to communicate with him your concerns. Don’t attack him though, and don’t sugarcoat how you feel.
  2. Try to find a videogame that you both can play (I enjoy Guitar Hero, and I don’t like videogames either)
  3. Suggest an activity that you know he enjoys or wouldn’t mind participating in. It’s important to suggest an activity before leaving it open-ended. Have a couple activities in mind in case he rejects the first one.
  4. Ask him to participate in an activity or event that you’re into (eg: let him know you want to see The Nutcracker ballet, and it’d be nice if he came along)

During this process, remember Rule #18: “Don’t Expect A Man To Change or Try To Change Him”.  If he doesn’t budge, maybe he isn’t Mr. Right. If he truly loves you, he’ll be conducive to your requests.

Dear Maya,

I’m dating a guy who lives about an hour from me. We see each other several times a week, the problem is I always end of driving to him. I don’t mind the commute that much except it would be nice if he came to me once in a while. Every time we make plans for him to come to my place, something comes up and I somehow end up at his place. What should I do?


Marcie, 33, Culter Bay, FL

Dear Marcie,

You’re spoiling your boyfriend. For you to drive that distance several times a week, it’s clear to me that you love him; the question is, are you showing him that you’re too willing to make that drive? In all established relationships, there should be a fair balance of give-and-take. At worst, he should be driving just as much as you’re driving. Ideally, he should be the one making the bigger sacrifice.

Start telling him you’re unable to make the drive, and see how he reacts. It’s also important to tell him how you feel about the driving situation; communication is key.

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, don’t let this situation make you break Rule 22: “ Don’t Live With A Man (Or Leave Things At His Apartment)”

Dear Maya,

I’ve been dating a guy for a month now and things were going really well! We totally hit it off but then suddenly this past week he’s been so distant. It’s like pulling teeth. What gives, should I end it?


Laurie, 38, Coral Gables, FL

Dear Laurie,

Thanks for the question. There are a lot of things that could be making your man so distant. First answer these questions….

  1. Are you positive he isn’t married? (see Rule #23)
  2. How sure are you that he’s not seeing other girls?
  3. Do you know his job or family situation?
  4. Has the intimacy dropped off?

These questions will help you determine the issue. Also keep in mind, it’s only been one month. Maybe you aren’t compatible and the magic is lost. Make sure you analyze the relationship and see if it’s worth it to keep continuing. If it’s a rollercoaster now, just imagine months and years down the road.

Rule #34: Love Only Those Who Love You

If you have a question and want to be featured in a future blog post, email your question to me at contact@rewardingrelationships.net


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